Les and I have made no secret of our desire to land hot bicycling boyfriends who court us with strolling rides through the countryside, trips to the repair shop, and outdoor weddings where we walk down the aisle in our finest spandex before riding off into the sunset on matching his and her road bikes.
Okay, perhaps we haven’t been that specific in the past, but that’s definitely the scene that plays out in my head whenever I reference my future PMC boyfriend(s).
Well, believe it or not, Les and I aren’t alone in our bike boyfriend fantasy… the French – arguably some of the world’s greatest romantics – are also embracing the concept of roadside romance.
The Frisky – an online news source that has covered pressing questions like “Are all your friends lying to you?” and “Would you rather appear completely naked (we’re talking full-frontal, vag-in-view nudity) on the cover of Vogue, or appear fully-clothed in a Playboy spread?” – recently reported on a hot new French dating website devoted to bicycle love.
Thanks to my sis for finding the
link, and so that you don’t have to click away from our page, here’s the short blurb that they published:
“Nothing cuter than a cute girl or boy on a bike, right? A new French dating website works off this principle. Called Velibataire, it’s a play on the French word for single (célibataire) and the name of the Paris public bike system (Vélib’). Because so many Parisians use these park-and-ride bikes to get around the city, it makes sense that you might cross a few hotties on your ride, just as you would on your daily subway commute. Velibataire lets users find other bikers closest to their neighborhood Vélib’ station, signal when they’re about to leave the house to pick up a bike (because maybe you’ll happen to “bump” into someone there), or organize bike ride dates with potential mates. Kind of a cute idea, n’est-ce pas? Think an online dating service like this would take off in the U.S.? [
Velibataire]”
And here’s a screen shot of Velibataire’s homepage:
Now I don’t speak French, but I'm confident that photo speaks for itself. And the concept definitely translates – I don’t think anyone gets on the T expecting to catch a love bug (though other communicable diseases are pretty much implied). A scenic bike trail, on the other hand, ripe with picnic tables and trees for carving in your lovah’s initials, well, that’s a different story.
So in response to the “article’s” final question – heck yeah I think that kind of service could take off in the U.S., and if I was capable of creating a website that involved more than picking a template from Blogger’s fine array of aesthetic alternatives, I’d be all over this.
So here’s what I’m thinking instead – I’ll supply the catchy website name, main graphic, and first dating profile, and someone else can do the dirty work of writing the html and finding me a biker boyfriend. Sound good?
I sure hope so, cause I already did my part of this assignment:
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Website name- Bicyngle (Get it? Love it? Good.)
Main graphic-
First Personal Profile-
Name: Danielle Cerny
Birthday: 3/3/84
Likes: Hydration, Helmets and hot chiseled men
Dislikes: Potholes, Port-a-potties, and pigeons, parakeets or really birds of any kind
About me: To be honest, I’ve already found love, and it came in the form of my Giant Avail. My Giant and I have shared many beautiful weekends together, but it has come to my attention as of late that my bike has found love with another:
At every water stop, the two seem to nestle up together, unconcerned with the backlash caused by their flagrant PDA. It was a hard reality to accept at first, but given the recent rumors that they’re expecting twin tricycles in the fall, I’ve come to terms with the need to find a bicycle boyfriend of a less literal sense.
On that front, I’m not asking for much- just someone who will hold my bike steady when I’m changing a flat, and agree to travel hand-in-hand with me down the bike trail of life.
Suitors should be in their mid- to late-twenties, capable of maintaining a minimum 16mph average on the road, and look damn good in spandex (photos required).
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And there you have it. I’m confident one of you oh-so-clever blog readers can make Bicyngle a reality, but in the meantime, feel free to post your own profiles or, even better, responses to my profile, in the comments section of this site. And, just putting this out there- I’m completely open to bribes, and will give dating preference to the biggest donors ;-)
Let the bicycle lovefest begin!
DIRECT YOUR BRIBES HERE
UPDATE!!! The shirt is now available with slightly toned down messages for anyone who was worried about getting strange looks in the supermarket. Now take your pick from the following designs: "fuck cancer", "eff cancer" or "suck it cancer ".
